SCORE KEY, Carlisle's Final Word.

Need a reminder on how I actually score these movies? Alright, here's how it works.

Choose a film. Got one? Good. Now, try to be fair with yourself or this will fall-flat.
 

Let's look at the script's internal logic. Did the story make sense within the confines of the world the film is set? Another way to look at that is 'was it full of stupid plot-holes?' Now we give the film a score between 0 and 2 (‘poor’, 'average' or 'good').

• Did the film make perfect sense? 2 points.
• Sort of worked, a little logic is disregarded to reach a satisfying climax? 1 point.
• The film had more holes than a net? 0 points.

Now the pacing...

• Were you on the edge of your seat the whole while? 2 points.
• Glanced at your watch a few times, getting a numb bum, drawn into a conversation? 1 point.
• Bored? 0 points.

Asthetic. Was it all up there on the screen for you to admire and ogle, or did the film feel a little 'made for TV'? It's a fair question, presentation matters. You may be thinking this puts small budget films at a disadvantage? Yes, it does. But bear in mind, that's only going to make a very small difference, it just won't be a perfect film, and you may even love it more for this.

• Were the sets and effects completely believable, given the constraints of the time it was made? Yes? 2 points.

• Workmanlike. They did the job, nothing more. Not a 'game changer'. 1 point.

• Laughable, distracting, lazy- even for a no-budget film. 0 points.

Alright, almost done. How about the acting?

• Was it all completely believable, did it serve the nature of the film (if it was a comedy, were the stars actually funny)? Yes? 2 points.

• Most of it held up, a few duff performances but nothing that ruined the film. 1 point.

• Bad. All bad. Transformers bad. 0 points.

This is the last question now, and it's possibly the most subversive. Did the film set out what it intended to achieve? This is the question most open to public debate. If the film was meant to be thought provoking, or funny, or exciting, or action packed, was it? I've seen too many action films that had no action, to many thrillers that didn't thrill, too many horrors that didn't scare, and too many 'thought provoking' films that just said the same bullshit over and over again (yes, war is bad. I know that). Otherwise, was it original?

• The film did exactly what it intended to do in a fresh and inventive way. 2 points.

• Yeah, but it's nothing you havn't seen a 100 times before. 1 point.
  Or, did it completely miss the mark? 0 points.